Get Over Here! For their tenth installment Monday Madness have set up their packages as awards in their annual Mortal Kombat tournament.
“It could be glitter, it could be an elephant… it could be anthrax”
“They are sending me a robot piece by piece”
“That is surprisingly functional”
Is your fridge missing a jellyfish? The bot found this little blue clay magnet on Etsy and it has gotten great feedback from subscribers. So far 33% of everyone the bot has sent this to gave it “thumbs up” and none have given it a “thumbs down”. Because of the positive response, the bot is now ordering a lot more jellyfish.
“Take your present to the next level with this Eminem Gangsta Wrapping Paper.” Open your present with dozens of tiny Eminems staring at you down as they are torn into pieces!
The bot found this on Etsy. It costs $16.10 to send to Australia and $20.93 to send to the United States. Isn’t that expensive! Whenever the bot buys a package that is under budget, it rolls over the extra funds to the other outstanding orders. So even if your average order isn’t $16.10, on some packages the bot will spend more and on others it will spend less depending on the product’s quality score. As of today 1.52% of the bot’s outstanding orders are over $16.10.
The bot tries to spend your funds on the best packages, so if there is a $4 product and a $16 product that look about the same, it will buy the $4 product and roll over the $12 balance to your other pending orders. The biggest part of the quality score is the feedback that you and other subscribers give the bot on the ‘Arrived Tab’ and the shipping time.
On your account you can set the budget and how many packages you want the bot to buy for each address. Here you are actually setting the bot’s “package preference” for the address, which is a number from 1 to 10. The bot uses the below colorful eye chart to figure out what the target budget for each package should be. For example, if you have the slider set all the way to the left at 1-2 packages per month and your budget is $30/month the bot will have a target budget of $20 per package and possibly get some Eminem Gangsta wrapping paper, if you set Eminem or wrapping paper as keywords.
Over on Instagram I found this great video of Mu the cat, who is pitching in and opening packages when home alone….
The bot has ordered this toy over and over again because cats love it. Of the subscribers who gave the bot feedback on this product 35 clicked thumbs up and only 3 clicked thumbs down. That is over 10-to-1 positive feedback! Those are the sort of packages that make it to the top of the bot’s buying list.
As a follow up to Matt Crawford’s latest video, he posted this picture of the weird little silicon (not rubber!) lemon-shaped tea defuser. The bot has found quite a few of these interesting looking tea defusers that have gotten good feedback. Add ‘tea’ as a keyword to your account if you enjoy loose leaf tea.
Last November the bot came across a listing for tiny elephants specially bred to survive intercontinental flights – yet versatile enough to help out with common household tasks. Trunks are so useful. The bot buys them faster and faster now as subscribers have given the pachyderms lots of thumbs up feedback. Vendors have been hastily squeezing the tiny elephants into packages by the handful as the orders come in.
I mention this as our friends at Monday Madness have released their first unboxing video of 2018. They got some of the better elephant packages, along with quite a lot of tat and some surprises. Halfway through the video an excited woman off-camera exclaims “This is the most amazing day of my life!” Hyperbole? Watch the video and judge for yourself.
Today I went through all the packages ever ordered by the bot and found the most expensive, most extravagant, product bought so far. This $284.05 set of 100 antique goose feather pens was sent to an actual subscriber.
Was it what they were expecting? Did they need 100 goose feather pens in their life? Their only keyword was ‘antique pen’. So the answer is probably yes, although they didn’t leave feedback.
To get packages like this add ‘antique pen’ as a keyword. Depending on your budget, you might not get 100 pens all at once. But unless you are supplying an army of medieval scribes that is probably just fine.
Last week a subscriber sent in this picture of a cat going to town on a stick the bot ordered as a cat toy. ‘Cat’ is the most popular keyword the bot is shopping for. It gets you tasty sticks like these.
Over on Instagram diastolic has posted a picture of this awesome plastic dinosaur ordered by the bot. He is clearly terrified. I wonder if it kicked the door in.
The bot sent freakyfrogfreak this pretty feather necklace last month. Too nice for a stocking!
